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Old Lutheran Humor
Lutefisk and Yams
 
 
 
          LUTEFISK AND YAMS
         by Ulf Gunnarsson
        
Hark and ware, oh Warrior!
Weird of Sven now hear you.
How good Lars he harried,
pestered him with questions.

Late at meadhall light burned;
Lars did strive to largen
belly with a bowl of
boiled fish his mission.

And some chunks of chicken,
cheese and bread and peasoup,
finally pounds of pancakes
paired with lingon berries.

Smallish snack he snuck while
woozy wife lay snoozing.
When inside there wandered
forth a fellow northman.

Lars did greet him greatly
for he knew the gruesome
tales of host who hasten
travellers forth from doorstep.

Lars did ask his name then.
"I am Sven," he mentioned.
"Sven I am," he stated.
"Do you like lutefisk and yams?"

"Nay." said Lars, "though largely
like I food most goodly, but
I do not like lutefisk and yams,
I do not like them Sven I am."

"Ah," said Sven most sagely.
"Would you eat them on a trip?
Would you eat them on your ship?"

"Nay," said Lars, "though largely
like I food most goodly, but
I would not eat them on a trip.
I would not eat them on my ship.
I do not like lutefisk and yams,
I do not like them, Sven I am."
"Ah," said Sven. "Then maybe
might you eat them on a raid?
Might you eat them with a maid?"

"Nay," said Lars most strongly.
"Like I food most goodly, but
I would not eat them on a raid,
I would not eat them with a maid,
I would not eat them on a trip,
I would not eat them on my ship.
I do not like lutefisk and yams.
I do not like them, Sven I am."

"Hmmm," said Sven, "Good fellow,
would you eat them on the field?
Would you eat them off your shield?"

"Nay!" cried Lars most wrothly,
"Like I food most goodly, but
I would not eat them on the field,
I would not eat them off my shield,
I would not eat them on a raid,
I would not eat them with a maid,
I would not eat them on a trip,
I would not eat them on my ship.
I do not like lutefisk and yams.
I do not like them, Sven I am."

Sven then looked most crafty.
He then slyly stated:
"Would you eat them served up cold?
Would you eat them if I paid you gold?"

"Well," said Lars, "since largely,
Like I food most goodly...
I might like lutefisk and yams.
I might like them, Sven I am."

Sven produced this Swedish
yam and lutefisk sample.
Lars did test this tasty
treat then longly pondered.

Stoutly Lars then stated:
"I despise lutefisk and yams.
I despise them, Sven I am.
I will not eat them served up cold,
I will not eat them if you pay me gold.
I will not eat them on the field,
I will not eat them off my shield,
I will not eat them on a raid,
I will not eat them with a maid,
I will not eat them on a trip,
And I will NOT eat them on MY ship!
I do not like lutefisk and yams,
I do not like them, Sven I am."
And he slew Sven.

Vant more funny stuff? Try dis book...
           
         
         
           
         
        
           
          
          
             
          
           
        
       

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